thoughts we all have scrolling through bumble

  1. Today will be the day I match with my husband. Let’s do this.
  2. Unless that was yesterday…
  3. Wait, I didn’t get any matches yesterday.
  4. So my future meant to be must not have gotten me yet.
  5. Uh oh, what if he swiped left?!
  6. Whatever, I’m over it.
  7. Oh, this guy is cute.
  8. In a weird lumber jack sort of way.
  9. Why do you think holding a fish you caught is sexy? Am I weird that I don’t find that sexy?
  10. Dude. There is no way that’s your Ferrari. You’re fooling no one.
  11. OMG he’s holding a puppy, he gets a right swipe.
  12. Next guy has a picture with his grandma, bonus points.
  13. This one smokes – NEXT!
  14. I got a match!
  15. Crap, what do I say!?
  16. I’ve only swiped right twice in the last twenty minutes, does that make me too picky?
  17. I’m not picky, I just know what I want #independent
  18. Granted I’m trolling through a dating app, not sure that qualifies as independent…
  19. Whatever, at least I’m using the one where I have to send a message first #girlpower
  20. Another fishing picture…are we serious right now?
  21. Bro no one wants to see you with your shirt off.
  22. AWWW HE’S HOLDING A BABY.
  23. Oh god I hope that’s not his baby.
  24. Ok the pool today is not up to par.
  25. Maybe I should stop relaying on technology and go be social in real life.
  26. Why do I do this to myself?
  27. If I see another picture of a fish I swear I’m deleting this app
  28. Oh well, I guess I’ll log back on tomorrow…

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